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"Helping You to Help Your ADHD Child"

by    Anthony Kane, MD
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Tips for Coping with a Misbehaving Child

  by Dr. Noel Swanson

The British have increased their media and news coverage regarding misbehaving children in school in recent days. The topic usually ends with a solution that centers around removing troublemakers from the traditional classroom setting.

This time the discussion was little bit different though. The new twist is that the notion that parents should stay home and watch their children once the kids have been kicked out of school for misbehaving.

Why would anyone do this? It is a nuisance to parents. The discussion also details letting special schools remain open, plus building more special schools for these misbehaving children.

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The child has been kicked out of the regular classroom which demonstrates that they are having a tough time fitting in with the usual student setting. Then the solution must include finding an educational setting where the students can actually thrive, right?

This makes you to guess what you can do as a parent if you child has been sent home from school due to their behavior. Thinking about this in detail is my forte. Especially since I have had to deal with the similar issues with my oldest child.

1. You are not a bad parent because of this. Don't waste time feeling sorry for yourself. Maybe your parenting skills could use some improvement, but that is the true for just about everyone. Try to be a better parent by actively searching for information through books and materials on raising kids.

2. Do not blame it all on your child's school. Your school does care for your child and maybe the mishandled education of your child is due to issues beyond their boundaries like not having enough resources or inadequate teacher training.

3. Ask for help from the local education authority (LEA). They should be able to supply an alternative learning setting for your child. You need to be persistent when you contact them, but avoid being mean. You can ask your politicians and newspapers to help you get the engine humming if you need to.

4. Understand that your child may need to move to an alternative classroom setting. Be ready for these changes. It is a good idea to understand that your child needs this help and to nip it in the bud now. It will be much worse later if you avoid dealing with your child's bad behaviors.

5. Seek professionals to determine if your child has a learning disability, ADHD or Asperger's syndrome. These can wreak havoc in the classroom. There is an enviroment in which children who suffer from these conditions can excel. It is a matter of finding the right educational setting.

6. Don't be tempted to look beyond your child's behavior or kid yourself into thinking that they are a model student. You may feel like defending your child and think that everyone is wrong about his behavior. It is more productive to acknowledge that there could be a problem and work it out with help from the LEA.

Well, that's just a few quick thoughts about it.

Hope that is of some help to you, if you are struggling with this at home. And, if you are an educator, please don't be one of the ones that keeps trotting out that nonsense about excluding children as being the solution! It helps no one, and solves no problems.

    About the Author
    For more tips on child behavior and for his outstanding book, take a visit to Dr. Noel Swanson's website Good Child Guide. He also does a free newsletter which is well worth getting.

Anthony Kane, MD

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